lazy blah dayz about me....
written on Wednesday, Jan. 28, 2004, @ 4:48 P.M..
Slacking again...I thought I would be able to keep up with no problem....Just sometimes I am afraid to write how I really feel...So instead I write a blah, blah entry about a bunch of stuff that don't make sence after I read them....
It's all about coming here to write anyways...am I right??? OF COURSE NOT...it's about feeling free and having an outlet to your anger, bad days, jealousy's and one's own personal feelings...
I don't feel safe and I feel alone...Those that know me...They know that my feelings are always real...those that don't know me...maybe I am not the type of diary you want to read...
Yeah I know what you may want to say...but I don't care...I like having this space for my vents and my outlet of my feelings....
B/F is starting to get on my nerves again...something happened here last night and it just confirms how I feel about our relationship...I wish I was just stronger....I need to get my thoughts together and decide if I want to spent my time in this relationship asking him to make decisions he should already know how to make...
I can't believe that I am 3 yrs into this so called partnership and things are still the same....AND YET I AM THE JEALOUS ONE!!!!
Too much to try and explain here....Maybe it is a little petty....But if you knew about all the facts of this relationship....you will know why it bothers so much to have to go through these things over and over again....
Well I don't want to type anymore....I am going to go lay on my couch and just cry....I just feel like it will help me...
TTYL