just a sad update....
written on Tuesday, Apr. 19, 2005, @ 3:44 P.M..
Well i just thought i would let you all know whats going on with me.......
1st- I no longer have my 3yr old nephew.......CPS said i am not suppose to give him back to his monther until i hear from them........But i am just tired of the drama that surronds my demon sister......Each time i break my back my back trying to help her and each time kicks me when i am down........so i told my parents (yes i know) again that i wash my hands of her and her kids......What a welcome home for my parents huh!!!! I am just fed up with her stupidity.......she then calls me from the hospital after her appointment(i guess my parents must have told her) to have her sons stuff ready cause she will be by to pick them up......nope......she never said thank you nor did she say it when she came and got the stuff.....i told my parents that she could be leaving in a cop car or ambulance and beg me to tend to her kids........but this time......i will just turn around and walk away......no more putting my life on hold because she decides to make a soap opera moment......
2nd- I no longer have Gordo(the puppy) B/F kept on insisting that Diamond needed to go(she grawled at him again) so i called the animal shelters and spca but got the same answer.......they would put her to sleep......they would not try to adopt her out because of her mix......so i tried to convince B/F about keeping Diamond, 2socks(my dads not taking him anymore....well he still ins't sure) and Gordo.......he said it's either gordo or diamond.......so i contacted the lady that has been after me for a pup on buffalo freecycle.......she came withing the 1/2 hour......and since 2socks wouldn't go near them or the kids......they decided on Gordo......So i let them take him.......i kinda knew they would pick him.....he's too sweet and loves kids......I am still crying about it.....
3rd- RED......Long one here but i will try to keep it short......when diamond had the puppies my DS kept asking me for a pup......B/F would not hear of it.....He said he would rather kill the pups then send them to her......So since i couldn't deal with all the dogs/pups/food/kids/expenses of everything......So i asked her if she would take red.....she agreed to taking him but when she saw it was more of a reponsibility to take care of a 4yr old dog......she started letting him roam free and go where ever......for the past week.....I have been taking red back to her house......a couple of times i would find him in our back yard....after having to deal with a litter of 10 i was really trying to avoid it from happening again......Plus i had her son with me.......she could have atleast helped me since i was helping her.......Well instead of continueing this saga i might as well tell you how this part of the story ended.....he was sent to the spca......there was a man there that went to adopt a dog......and when he saw red he asked my dad and demon sister what was the reason they were surrendering him? when my dad told him that it was because he's a jumper and my DS can't tend to him anymore.....he asked if they sure they want to do that being that he was such a good looking dog???? and when my dad said yes.......he said he will adopt him.......my dad said that it was an older man(but younger then my dad) so i know he will be going to good home......
Well this is long enough.....I am sad.....i am drained.....and i am pissed........i have had 2 panic attacks in the past couple of days and i was doing so well......my ssi case goes to court on the 5th and it is just too much for me to handle right now.......it doesn't really seem that bad when you think about it......but the emotional and mental strain of it all....isn't healthy for someone like me.......so if you don't hear from me in a while.......just know i am ok.......i will be back soon.......i just need some calm relaxing time(i just wish i knew how to have one)......
sorry for writing the book........